Getting bitten in the ace


My husband had taken our son into the bathroom of a restaurant. It was a nice restaurant, not some hole in the wall. Now, not to brag, but my son at 5 years old is a prolific reader. He reads EVERYTHING. it just so happened that on the wall of the bathroom, someone had written an unsavory phrase. Matthew turns to my husband and says, “Daddy? What does ‘I want to eat your aces mean’?” Lou looks over at the wall and sees that is says “I want to eat your ass”. So now he is in the precarious position of telling the truth or making up some lame story about what that means.

He tells Matthew, “Well, honey. That is a bad thing that someone wrote.”

“Bad how?”

“Well, it is like saying you want to bite someone’s bum.”

Matthew is quiet for a while and then he says, “Ewww. I don’t want someone biting my bum. And I CERTAINLY wouldn’t bite someone elses. What if it is dirty?”

So Lou (trying not to laugh) tells him he is right, that is a bad thing someone put there.

As matthew came out of the bathroom he came running to me, saying loudly as he runs thru the restaurant, “Mommy! Someone wants to eat aces in the bathroom.”

Reading is great, but it has come back to bite us in the ace.

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